As a former English major, I had to take several survey classes covering various periods of literature. Although my favorite survey was the one that dealt with medieval literature and the real gems that are often overlooked by people both within and without the book world, my last survey introduced me to the wonder that is Oscar Wilde. Not only is the man’s work hilarious, it also contains a number of fantastic quotes about food. Below I’ve attached some of my favorites from The Importance of Being Ernest. If you haven’t read the book, you need to, and if you have, it might be time to pick it up again. Read the quotes below if you don’t believe me because they’re guaranteed to sway you to Team Wilde and brighten up your morning!
-“How you can sit there, calmly eating muffins when we are in this horrible trouble, I can’t make out. You seem to me to be perfectly heartless.”
-“Well, I can’t eat muffins in an agitated manner. The butter would probably get on my cuffs. One should always eat muffins quite calmly. It is the only way to eat them.”
-“I say it’s perfectly heartless your eating muffins at all, under the circumstances.”
“I hate people who are not serious about meals. It is so shallow of them.”
-“Good heavens, I suppose a man may eat his own muffins in his own garden.”
-“But you have just said it was perfectly heartless to eat muffins!”
-“I said it was perfectly heartless of YOU under the circumstances. That is a very different thing.”
-“That may be, but the muffins are the same!”
“You have filled my tea with lumps of sugar, and though I asked most distinctly for bread and butter, you have given me cake. I am known for the gentleness of my disposition, and the extraordinary sweetness of my nature, but I warn you, Miss Cardew, you may go too far.”
“You can’t possibly ask me to go without having some dinner. It’s absurd. I never go without my dinner. No one ever does, except vegetarians and people like that.”
This is just the tip of the iceberg for Wilde humor, so if you’re looking for a quick, fun read, look no further than The Importance of Being Ernest…don’t watch the film on Netflix, though, because that is truly awful. Also, let me know what you think about this post because I’m considering of making it a weekly or monthly thing. There are so many authors out there with such great things to say about food and I would love to share them with you! Enjoy your day and remember: eat your muffins this morning calmly or face some dire consequences.